I may have mentioned Pandora before, and how I put time and energy into training it not to disappoint me. I’m happy to say I’ve got it pretty well bent to my will and can go days and days without hearing any Journey or that horrible song about just laying here. On the positive side, I’ve “liked” so many songs I like that hardly any time can go by without hearing one and no matter how tense I find myself at work, a song of which I’m fond can always calm me right down. This is a good thing. If you had any idea how tense I get out in the real world, you’d understand. And some kooky station I have as part of my mix plays “Sugar, Sugar” by the Archies. That is a song that always cheers me up, no matter how frantic my day is. I first heard it as a child when I cut a forty-five out of the back of some cereal box and played it on my close’n’play. Super sweet!
The other night, I had to fix a home haircut administered by my daughter to her own head. It was nice, and reminiscent of a sweeter time. In her defense I haven’t had to do this in years and years, and the fixing was light years less necessary than it was then. And as I said, it was nice. I was surprised she trusted me. Anyhow, we listened to her Pandora stations while I snipped away and although I don’t claim to love all her music, there were some cross overs. It was pleasant. The stuff good moods are made of.
I thought I had Pandora trained not to play the Eagles, but I guess not. Unwanted-first-few-bars-of-Hotel- California-before-I-can-hit-the-“don’t like”-button aside, I love Pandora. I love it because I can listen to a ridiculous mix of Carpenters, Green Day, Etta James, the Kinks and Parliament all day long – a mix I haven’t found anywhere else, without obsessive station changing. And anything at all I can do without some form of obsession attached is a good thing.
The more I try and learn to let go of stuff and leave it up to a benevolent universe, the more I find myself rearranging my pencils, or cleaning out my files or adding another step to an already rather complex mascara application process. I guess that’s okay – I mean the goal is to be more open to what life has to offer and not be so stuck offering life what little I’m willing to give. Any kind of letting go is hard: overcoming addiction, letting your kids grow into independent individuals, allowing yourself to fall in love. But – it’s all good and healthy and absolutely the right thing to do. I am becoming more willing to let go and enjoy the ride. I do trust fate and myself and the heavenly hosts, or whomever, to make the right choices. If a few more compulsions slip in along the way, who cares.