Abduction by mary elizabeth

I’m pretty sure aliens abducted my boyfriend. I didn’t see it happen or anything, but the evidence is strong!  Just like in the movies, I keep asking whatever it is they left in his place test questions and it keeps failing.

 For example:

Me: My company picnic is on Sunday. Should I get you a ticket?

“Boyfriend”: Of course! I’ll make sure I’m off work in time.

 Or how about this:

Me: I have to work on the 4th of July. Would you be willing to take the kids to the parade and then to the park for the fair?

“Boyfriend”: Sure!

 See? Clearly not him. My actual boyfriend hates picnics and parades and fun. He hates doing anything that’s community spirited. Evidently, the aliens based my boyfriend’s replacement on some amalgam of the “typical American boyfriend” and not him specifically.  But – I’m thinking I may adjust to life with this replicant.  I may even grow to love it in time. I kind of miss my angry little rock star, though.

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2 thoughts on “Abduction by mary elizabeth

  1. malificent Funderbuck says:

    Wait, back up the truck. You have to work on the 4th of July? WTF? I guess some businesses just hate America and all it stands for.

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