I’m pretty sure aliens abducted my boyfriend. I didn’t see it happen or anything, but the evidence is strong! Just like in the movies, I keep asking whatever it is they left in his place test questions and it keeps failing.
Me: My company picnic is on Sunday. Should I get you a ticket?
“Boyfriend”: Of course! I’ll make sure I’m off work in time.
Or how about this:
See? Clearly not him. My actual boyfriend hates picnics and parades and fun. He hates doing anything that’s community spirited. Evidently, the aliens based my boyfriend’s replacement on some amalgam of the “typical American boyfriend” and not him specifically. But – I’m thinking I may adjust to life with this replicant. I may even grow to love it in time. I kind of miss my angry little rock star, though.