Maiden, Mother, Crone by mary elizabeth

eleven stages of womanhoodOn Friday I’ll be fifty years old.  Sounds a bit extreme, doesn’t it?  I know.  Show off.  But – there it is.  And you know what?  I really can’t even think of anything interesting to say about it, other than that.  I mean – I’m certainly feeling proud of myself for hitting it clean and sober.   Oh and guess what – I quit smoking at the start of this month so I’m starting this new decade a non smoker. I haven’t been able to say that since I turned ten.  And I figured out that I’ve lived a third of thesePacific-Ocean-Sunset fifty years within listening distance of the Pacific Ocean.  That’s kind of cool.  I have teenaged children now.  That’s also cool and my favorite age so far by far.  Favorite age to parent, not be.  Anyhow – basically all’s well.  I am moving from mother to crone with a smile.

mother treeSo – what am I going to do to mark this milestone?  On the social end, I’m going to have dinner with friends on my birthday and I’m taking a trip to Monterey with my family the weekend after.  And I always make a big ass deal about my birthday so my poor co-workers have no choice but to take notice.  But on a personal note, I’m going to get up early and run down to the beach and find a nice spot and just sit and connect with the universe – rain or shine.  I’m also going to try and come up with some sort of list of reasonable goals.  There’ll be some big stuff like buying a home and lots of little stuff like reading more and cleaning out my shoe closet.  But mainly – I want to stay close to the people that matter most to me.  If I have any regrets from maiden and motherhood, (and I mean real regrets, not little ones like forgetting to get out the St. Patrick’s day decorations that one year….) they are centered on people I miss.  I let a lot of sweet, dear people fade out of my life for no reason other than being too self-centered.  I’m feeling so much more able to love now.  I’m not willing to let that happen so maiden mother cronefrequently anymore.

I’m definitely excited to see what the next fifty years are going to bring.  And that alone is a happy thing.  Meaning – I’m not looking forward with fear or frustration or ennui or dread or anything negative.  I feel like I have choices, if not right this instant, then in the not too distant future.  At least, I feel like I can go ahead and set goals for myself and dream up fun things to do.  I think I’m going to like being a crone.

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6 thoughts on “Maiden, Mother, Crone by mary elizabeth

  1. Teresa says:

    Hey…you didn’t use the term ‘half-century’ young! Perhaps you can use it in your next half-century blog. Happy 50th!

  2. I turn 50 in 8 months and have no idea how I will feel about it.

  3. Beth Cordasco says:

    Love this post! And congrats on the not smoking, and I won’t tell your mom about the “since I was 10 comment” ha ha ;) Hopefully we’ll reconnect one day soon. HAPPY 50TH BIRTHDAY! xoxo, Beth

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